What are you Thankful for this Thanksgiving well let me tell you what I am Thankful for first of all my three beautiful daughters,my grandson and my new grandchild on the way and last but not least my husband. I am also thankful for GOD for him not anwsering my prayers . The prayers I speak of is of dying and going to heaven to be in his grace. You see some time ago I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia,and i also have depression,ibs,anxiety,tmj,rls,migranes but a body that looks normal other than gaining about 50 pounds due to medication that doesnt seem to help or work. I live my life each day wishing I was in a world of understanding and compassion. A world where people dont judge a book by its cover. I have applied for disability and denied. I am in appeals, but even my family and friends look at me like im crazy. You see I am tired of living my life pretending to be ok and for pretending that my feelings arent hurt by the looks or advice. Oh you hurt , or oh your depressed or oh your tired it will get better just do this. Well I am sick of it or you see or hear them talking about you behind your back . This is a horrible disease that unless you have it dont understand. Each day i wake and am not sure how i will feel . When I rarely sleep any ways thats part of it insomnia, and tiredness and constant wide spread pain and then the diarhea or constipation,and then theirs the muscle spasms and headaches and migranes and anxiety cause all of this together is so overwhelming, and not to mention the fact that I am no longer able to work and we are living on one income and my husband tries really hard but we still are living check to check. And anxiety about giving my children all the things all children want besides love and affection. Its realy frustrating My children do have a real father that choses not to support them and heres this guy who goes to work everyday and does the best he can. Are you beginning to get my picture on why I am so thankful . People take there life for granted and just doing normal everyday things for granted.Be thankful for what you have and support the people around you . Stop all the gossip and trying to hurt people around you. Treat people the way you want to be treated and try to do something nice for someone , and please dont take anyone for granted cuase you never know how long they will be here for. Regrets are horrible. And I havent even mentioned half the things I live each day. But I try and have faith that one day I will have the benefits that I desrve so my family does not struggle and that people start to treat each other better . This disease has taught me to slow down there are so many things I cant do any more and things I push myself to do because I am strong minded and stubborn and a fighter. But I realize now that life is short dont put off things or people. Always treat everyone the way you want to be treated , dont judge and treat some people better than others. And remember that words are hurtful and actions also. be thankful for everything you have and give thanks and have faith. I have faith that even though the illnesses I have can not be cured that I will learn to live with them and that one day I will have some kind of quality of life. And People will stop being so unthankful for what they have and who they have around them and enjoy life while its here. I pray for all who have an uncurable illness that with gods grace cures will be found and that our youth of tommorrow will one day provide anwsers for things. Happy Holidays everyone from our home to yours.

 

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