FRANKLIN — Ever wonder what the president of the United States ponders behind the closed doors of the Oval Office?

Communist China conspiracy theories? The going rate for a pound of turkey? Or does he wonder perhaps how he can convince the nation that celebrating Thanksgiving equals eternal damnation?

The Teche Theatre in Franklin will tackle those hardball U.S. policy issues gripping the mind of every American this weekend with the opening of its fall production “November.”

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The nationally acclaimed Broadway play written by David Mamet introduces President Charles Smith, a paranoid braggart finishing an exceedingly unpopular first term in office.

The country is at war, though President Smith cannot recall with who, as his mornings are spent abusing his presidential powers to sway votes in his upcoming re-election, thickening his dwindling campaign coffers and arguing with his wife about White House furniture.

“Why have they teamed up against me now?” Smith asks his advisor Archer Brown during one scene. 

“Because you screwed up everything,” Brown answers without hesitation. “They hate you.”

“Well at least I’ve done something,” Smith replies. “What has this other fella done?”

The struggling president is played by Teche Theatre board member and veteran Ed Verdin, who decided to pitch the play locally after seeing the original on Broadway last year.

The modern political satire is not a typical Teche Theatre production, but after reviewing the script the group decided to “offend everyone here as much as possible regarding race, religion, creed, etc.”

“Because of the harsh political climate in the country, I thought it was time to just laugh,” said director Diane Wiltz. “What a wonderful way to just laugh about our differences.”

The play was written during the 2008 presidential race, made evident through the prevalence of familiar snippets like “hope and change” and allusions to the widespread mockery former President George W. Bush experienced while in office.

“Do you know where Papsmearage, Bulgaria, is?” President Smith asks as he tries to extort a hefty campaign donation from a turkey company representative.

“No.”

“Nobody does,” Smith answers with a snide smile, unaware he grossly mispronounces the location of a secret CIA encampment.

The play’s parodies chaff a wide variety of commander-in-chief duties, from negotiations with Iran to the ceremonial pardoning of a live turkey on White House grounds.

“I call this a Depends show — because you’re going to need them,” Verdin said.

The theatre made changes to the original script because of its strong language, though Wiltz said the play is still suited for an adult audience.

“You have to give them something better than the things they like or better than the things they hate, like ‘Free love’ or ‘Kill the Jews,’ ” Smith says to his speech writer during one heated scene.

The six-member cast is filled with veterans of the Teche Theatre stage, including Ricky Pellerin as Archer Brown and Denise Galatas as speechwriter Clarice Bernstein.

“If you want the laws changed, then you go to the people who make the laws and you do what? You bribe them,” Smith tells his speech writer during the play.

The play debuts locally at 7:30 p.m. Saturday, continuing at 3 p.m. Sunday and at 7:30 p.m. Monday and Tuesday.

Tickets are $10 and are available in advance at Fad Newsstand in Franklin.

For more information, call the Teche Theatre at 828-2787, or visit the Web site at www.ttpaonline.com.