Child Support

by Angry Mom, tired of watching her Daughter cry
Published/Last Modified on Sunday, January 13, 2008 12:32 PM CST

Why is it so hard for men, to pay child support. Now, don't get me wrong , I know for a fact 90% of men pay, but it's that last 10% that refuses to do so.

Why? Please tell me  why you do not pay?  How do you think your child goes to private school? How does she eat, wear clothes, how does she live in the house that she lives in, how does she go to the doctor when she is sick? How does she do this?

 

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Ding, Ding, Ding, we have a winner. ME!!!!! Oh my goodness, I have to have a job, to support my child!

I do not not get the medical card for my daughter, we have insurance. Which I remind you, her father is supposed to pay, he DOES NOT. I do not get food stamps, or welfare, instead I get a letter from the state that says he owes $9,980 for back support for  2006, 2007 and he is already behind $350.0 for 2008.  Why does the state send me this? I know he is not paying, are they going to step in a do anything? No of course not, this is a civil matter. But here is my question "How come if he refuses to pay child support why can't I terminate his rights?" Because the state says NO. But why? He is not supporting my daughter, why do I have to give him time to pay the back support? He knew he wasn't paying any child support in 2005, 2006, 2007, why should this come as a susprize to him? He knows!

I mean I do not understand? What happens if I decided to stop paying for everything? I would go to jail, for not taking care of my child, or OCS would step in place her with soemone else. So how come the same thing does not happen to him?  How much back child support is too much? Seriously, I want to know, when do I start having rights as a mother to say enough is enough?  Keep your damn money, just sign over your rights? I'm not getting it now, so why should it matter in 10 years?  Because let's be real people if he is not paying the little amount now that he owes, do you really think that he will pay the back support?  I'm sorry if you can go out a buy a brand new SUV, why can't you pay the $350.00/month your supposed to pay?  Why couldn't he go out and buy a used SUV, and pay half of the note of a brand new SUV and give me the other half?  And how is it you never have time to see your child but you can go out every weekend? How come you see your child in Wal -Mart and say"I'll see you this weekend?" And as soon as you leave, your daughter says "I know he won't come, it's ok., he'll come when he has time."

I want to know when do you have time to see her? Because you had nothing but time when you were making her?  When does she become important? When?  Please tell me, so I can tell her and maybe she won't cry anymore at night?  When is enough, enough? Because I'm tired of lying for you, I tired of making up excuses for you, I'm tired of stuggling b/c you refuse to pay child support, I just tired of looking at her standing in the window saying :What time is it? He said he would be here a noon?" It's almost 6:30pm now, it's dark and yet she is still waiting?  I'm too tired to watch anymore. Why do you do this?

Comments

    Lisa wrote on Aug 20, 2009 12:21 PM:

    " The issues here are about the child or children,and about the deadbeat dad or mom.
    I had to pay support myself and my second husband paid child support for my daughter,and had it was taken from his income tax,to which we didn't complain about.
    My complaint is my ex-is working,getting paid in cash, makes god knows how much money,so I go to court again to hear the same story he doesn't have a job,and cannot pay,so I get a whole $34.00 a month,I told court about the job and without proof you lose. "

    jack wrote on Aug 16, 2009 12:42 AM:

    " the problem in this country is the system is not reasonable in setting the support payments,it should be a flat rate.and not always rasing the rate. american women think they give birth to atm machines not kids. "

    alora wrote on Feb 19, 2009 10:56 PM:

    " The only problem you could face with a used car is with the way it was handled and if it has been in any major accident. However these are things which you can easily check out and ascertain for yourself before you buy it. If you inspect the car you can probably gauge only what is seen on the outside by you but for further investigation you can give the VIN number to Carfax and get a complete history of the car.
    ==============================
    alora
    Used Cars "

    Yall make me sick wrote on Aug 28, 2008 6:29 PM:

    " The fathers role is only to be a paycheck.Women on the other hand seldom pay cs.I turned in the woman behind my home because she is 60g in arrears. Nothing happened, figures. I guess I dont deserve to see my child either even though I pay. I am tired of supporting her non working behind. kids are 10 and 8 and hasnt worked a day in her life. Section 8 all the way and all the other government sponsored programs. Moochers. I cant wait till the system collapses..vote Obama and speed up the process. "

    Yall make me sick wrote on Aug 28, 2008 6:17 PM:

    " Why does the state award custody to a convicted felon?Just cause shes a woman?Distribution on 3 counts?What is the state thinking?I can't get custody because I am a man that can provide a better home and atmosphere and schooling environment.Yall whine about money. I whine about my little girls growing up to be trash and theres nothing I can do about it.I filed for custody 3x and shot down everytime. Its all about money. I paid 4000 dollars in back CS and she only got 1600 of that.Guess what she bought for the kids...Absolute vodka paid the bills and rent "

    Yall make me sick wrote on Aug 28, 2008 6:10 PM:

    " All of you women griping about non paying fathers need to get a life.90% of yall wouldnt have this problem if you had morals and would stay with your babies fathers and would do everything it took.He beats me/He does this and that.No man just beats his wife. She makes him do it.Private schools thats your problem..go public. Why does a child need more than $300 anyway?wheres your portion? Bills,food,housing thats not what its for.I pay the same bills,food,housing wheres your portion to me then?Try having the man breathing down your back for 18 years. yall need to goto jail "

    Scorned wrote on Mar 1, 2008 10:10 AM:

    " I have to say my problem is this...I am the new wife and my husband has to pay child support for his son, and that is not what we have a problem with, what we have a problem with is he adopted his son in which his ex made with someone else who wanted nothing to do with the kid, so my husband stepped in cuz he loved him and wanted to be a father to him...when he has lost his job she starts to gripe and threaten to put him in jail!!! "

    Ex-Mother-In-Law wrote on Jan 28, 2008 4:08 PM:

    " My daughter is having a rough time supporting her kids. The state keeps having to chase him down. He job hops and his now wife brags how they don't have to work because of a large inheritance he got. Why can't the state garnish that inheritance? He is suppose to supple health insurance which he doesn't. He doesn't acknowledge his 2 kids. He and his wife are sayingthe children are not his. Why doesn't he pay for DNA - BECAUSE HE KNOWS THEY ARE HIS! His wife even told my granddaughter that he was not her father. "

    system mom wrote on Jan 25, 2008 7:36 PM:

    " some of you talk like the system is so dam great u try explaining why the fathers not doing what he should and riding a van to n from where u need to be because he just to dam buss.or getting 344.00 a mth. for 5 kids and soon as the father starts paying they get theres off top so your child has to wait 4 theres what are you to pay with that or you get a job n something gose wrong not by your control what then "

    single parent michelle wrote on Jan 25, 2008 7:28 PM:

    " N.I. new wifes are a problem after 7 years of marriage the new wife gets to decide which child the ex- will spend time with needless to say when i was gapped open it didnt matter if she was or wasnt his,i was a week pregant when we met and he ran her father off now we have a daugther together but i have 5 kids my son was 3years old now hes 15 meat wants nothing to do whit him who explains why why why ??????? "

    MOTHER@FATHERallme wrote on Jan 25, 2008 7:19 PM:

    " agreeing to a sucking system-nonpaying parents should be put threw a program to find work or go back to school just like parents who are responsable enough to take care of there children when in which you need help you endure all kinds of programs why are there non for the parents who owe support?????????? "

    Mandy wrote on Jan 23, 2008 1:35 PM:

    " I am also a mother with 2 kids and there dad refuses to pay anything. Sad but someone has to take care of these kids. Although it is a hard job I will never give up on them like there father did, He dosent even call them, and they finally stopped asking about him, It hurts me every day when I think about the fact they may never have him again how does a mother handle that? He can at least send them money so they can go on those field trips at school with all there other friends. "

    newpngrad!!! wrote on Jan 22, 2008 9:40 PM:

    " the father of my 2 kids have been court ordered to pay child support. he is behind over $30,000. he has been ducking and dodging both myself and the worker in charge of the case. he even had the audacity to demand i drop the support charges against him. since i disagreed to do so, he disowned our kids. sorry to say, but my opinion is that child support services willingly help those who receive additional government assistant. i encourage all who is in this fight to pray and ask for guidance & support. "

    Single Mother wrote on Jan 22, 2008 6:15 PM:

    " I think the system needs change. If you can't be a parent all the way and support the life you helped make, you shouldn't be able to see that child. Step up or step out. Stop making excuses and be a parent. Your child will know where they're loved. One day you will answer to that said child. What will you're answer be? "

    To do because we have to wrote on Jan 22, 2008 1:57 PM:

    " The state should not be in our business but that's how it is. The states system is not setup in the best way. I believe they should ask/questionare how we believe the states system could improve for all of us. It's not just Fathers it's Mothers of children that do not pay support. The bottom line it's all about our childs future and our nations future and the parents which help to bring them into this world to remember to do what's right to do the best for your child and not have someone force you to. "

    new wife wrote on Jan 22, 2008 12:19 PM:

    " ...in addition, as a new wife, do I like the fact that my husbands ex wife & her husband do not work and they support themselves, my step daughters and their own two children off of his child support and welfare? No I don't, but there is not much I can do about it. I pride myself knowing that he sees his children because of ME, the "New Wife", the one who made sure the child support was paid and that his kids have clothes on their backs and food on the table!!! "

    new wife wrote on Jan 22, 2008 12:08 PM:

    " to deadbeat dads who says new wives are the problem,when i met my husband he was $19,000 behind on child support and didn't get to see his children. In the 4 years we have been married, not only have we paid off his arrears but we get visitation w/ his children (who live in a different state) here periodically throughout the year. Don't blame all new wives. There ARE some of us good ones out there who care about the mothers of their step children!!!! The person to blame is the father who didn't pay in the firstplace! "

    well i dont know wrote on Jan 21, 2008 9:33 PM:

    " well my husband pays childsupport plus some and i aint NEVER seen such a mess with the state. but the state stuck my sister out and wont do nothing about her ex. hes 4000.00 in the whole and shes got 2 jobs to support them. the killing part is that he wants to see them and then hits them. now how the state has not picked that up. Louisiana is a poor state no matter where you are in this state. we cant get food stamps or medicade, unless we dont do anything in this state then they wanna help.butthekillinpartisOCSdontdoanythingeather.justlookatthatkidthatgotkilled10reportsaintthatashame "

    BROKE wrote on Jan 21, 2008 6:55 PM:

    " They just go after more money for one reason...to still be in CONTROL!Why doesnt she let me have the kids,which i would take in a heart beat,and let her pay me.Then we would see how she feels... "

    Just wondering wrote on Jan 21, 2008 2:40 PM:

    " I understand where all of you are coming from. I have an ex that doesnt pay nothing and I am trying to be the nice one and not put him on child support because then I would feel bad. I have to much of a soft heart.My daughter is 5 and she is in private school because of my husband now mother. Would I be wrong if I put him on child support? "

    Tra wrote on Jan 21, 2008 10:33 AM:

    " From being a strong woman all I can say is forget about him and his child support money, because trust me in the future he will regret what he did when your daughter grows up to be somebody and it will be too late! I know it's hard being a single parent but keep doing what you doing it will all payoff! And stop making excuses to your daughter and tell her the truth because obviously he don't care so why should you? "

    deadbeat dads wrote on Jan 21, 2008 9:18 AM:

    " yes i do think the wives of the husbands that have to pay child support are the reason they dont pay are dont pay on time because they hate to see the ex wife get the money beacause they are greedy they want all the money for themselves and i know one wife that wont let the husbands kids go over there because the extra bedroom is for show only and the kids cant sleep on the new sofa how mean is that, also if he does want to see his child its only for a few hours. "

    the system is messed up wrote on Jan 21, 2008 9:09 AM:

    " i have known people on both sides that are paying and getting the child support its the system they do what they want it is different for everybody my sister had to pay child support for 2 kids. Before she could make a payment her employer got a letter to start garnishing her check, and on the other side of this my other sister has to struggle to live because he just doesnt want help her with anything her son is a sr. and he is 19 the ex is not paying child suppport any more and he still wont help her with any of the expenses for the graduation supplies that sucks "

    Ashley wrote on Jan 21, 2008 8:47 AM:

    " IT TAKES TWO PEOPLE! You can blame everything on the ex, she can blame everything on him. But they need to be blaming thierselves. My child is a well adjusted child. She has two parents. I know not all families work like this. I know! But it is up to adults to make sure this happens, whether they are together or not. It is what is best for the child, NOT WHAT is best for the ADULT. Children are forever commitments. Not maybe today or maybe tommorrow! EVERYDAY ALL DAY/NIGHT/MONTH/YEAR/FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE! "

    Child Support wrote on Jan 20, 2008 9:33 PM:

    " Some fathers allow the step mothers to dictate about their children. They dodge jobs and job hop not to pay child support like they should. There are wicked step moms and the fathers are worms to allow their new wives to control them when it comes to their
    children. "

    Unknown wrote on Jan 20, 2008 9:11 AM:

    " I was in the same situation as you. A little advice for you...never put him down in front your child and learn to let it go. He will face God one day, and let him explain it to Him. Know that you cannot change a person; you just become a mother and father to your child. I told mine that his dad was sick and couldn't focus on what was right in life but hopefully one day he would. He died last year and never had that chance to know his wonderful child. "

    frustrated wrote on Jan 20, 2008 12:28 AM:

    " thank you jessica i said the same thing my husband missed 1 payment and they garnished him guess they ran out of bricks for you husband cause they used them on mine and the sad thing is my husband wanted his child to live with him but she said no , ok it takes 2 why does the woman automaticaly get the child?? my husband is very fit to raise the child and i tell you what she would NOT have had sex at 13!!!!!! "

    Jessica wrote on Jan 19, 2008 12:48 PM:

    " I am having the same problem with my ex. He is 5,000 in the whole, violating a 2 year probation for being found in contempt of court of childsupport, has no insurance on the kids and the state still keeps telling me that a court date will come. IT NEVER DOES!!! My present husband pays 900.00 a month in child support to his 3 kids and has been paying faithfully for the last 14 years. Out of the 14 years he missed 1 payment and the state liked to have come down on him like a ton of bricks. "

    Ashley wrote on Jan 19, 2008 12:38 PM:

    " I take care of my children. ALL OF MY MONEY GOES TOWARDS MY CHIDREN. It is not my fault you are winning b/c you can't pay. You should have thought about that before you UNZIPPED your pants. I have no sympathy for men or WOMEN who do not take care of their children. I am not picking or attacking you personaly. People need to think about EVERYTHING before they decide to have a child. It takes 2 to make a child, so 2 people should be EQUALLY responsable. And $200/month does not cut it! nothng personaly "

    continuing Hey Ashley wrote on Jan 18, 2008 3:25 PM:

    " it went to the child it would be fine, but it dosen't.I understand the child lives in the house, uses electricity, water, and needs a way to get around, and food and drinks.Logically, these things are needed anyway, even for one person, the only major difference would be the food and when you have a family of four already one more to the food bill is not that much.Thats is why the state figures my 2% per child is fine. So she gets more because that is the way the system is set up.THAT SUCKS! "

    Hey Ashley wrote on Jan 18, 2008 3:14 PM:

    " Unless you're in the situation you have no room to talk. Let somebody take your whole check and see how it feels. We don't have a problem paying, we have a problem with her running up medical expenses, like braces, that we have to pay half of, agree to and make monthly payments, until she paid it all off and expected us to pay in 5 days, we don't have $1000 to drop in 5 days because that is what she wanted to do. I agree with BROKE, the more you make the more they get and if "

    Gina wrote on Jan 18, 2008 1:01 PM:

    " We all heard the saying " the good have to suffer for the bad" My son has 2 children and pays faithfully. But it is never enough(according to some). In his case mom works for cash money therefore shows hardly any income. And you know what that means. I understand all these children need to be taken care of but by both mother and father. They were created by 2 parties and should by supported by 2 parties. "

    Something's Off wrote on Jan 18, 2008 8:35 AM:

    " I am just appaled at the things people do to justify not paying child support. I gurantee if your were ARRESTED every time you missed ONE payment, there would be NO MISSED PAYMENTS. If they put your picture in the paper and let everyone know your a DEAD BEAT,youl'ed PAY! "

    Ashlye Orduna wrote on Jan 18, 2008 8:16 AM:

    " Why is everyone complaining that they have top pay to support THEIR child? This is what you ARE SUPPOSE TO DO! I don't care if your ex asks the judge for your whole damn check. Pay it!Lady, No WAY your husband missed one payment. Children cost money. Pay it! "

    Broke!! wrote on Jan 18, 2008 2:33 AM:

    " I pay my child support on time every month,now i have a better job paying more money and she is taking me back to court for more.Why is it the harder i work to better myself she gets it?She says she deserves it..the courts are like her full of sh**!!! "

    Best Granny in the WORLD wrote on Jan 17, 2008 4:32 PM:

    " My daughter is going thru the same thing. He owns $2300.back support, but going to get a new truck. Come on ppl. something is not right with this picture. But what can I say "NOTHING".
    My grand daughter is getting the best care from both sets of grandparents. One day she will be like your child and stand and the window and say "mommy when is dad coming to see me" I miss him. This hurts my heart to even imagne this picture. I know my daughter is trying really hard and hurting too "

    frustrated wrote on Jan 17, 2008 4:13 PM:

    " LOL what do you ppl what me too say ? i dont know who your worker is BUT I KNOW MY HUSBAND WAS ONLY A MONTH BEHIND AND HIS DAUGHTER IS 18 IN 5 MONTHS ITS NOT 5 MONTHS TO PAY BACK AND THE COMPANY MY HUSBAND WORKS FOR REFUSE TO GARNISH HIS CHECK BECAUSE WHEN HE TOLD US THE WORKER SENT HIN A LETTER WE BROUGHT OUR RECIEPTS TO HIM AND SHOWED HIM HE WAS JUST ONE MONTH HE SAID THAT BS AND HE WASNT GARNISHING IT AND HE DIDNT !!!!! "

    Iberian wrote on Jan 17, 2008 3:59 PM:

    " Fed up Father, what is stopping you from raising your child? So she doesn't pick up the phone? Go over there, bring her to school so she won't be late, do the BEST you can for her. Go over and help her study. Be part of the solution. "

    TIRED OF FIGHTING wrote on Jan 17, 2008 3:20 PM:

    " YOU KNOW THE COURT SYSTEM REALLY SUCKS,BUT WHAT IS WORSE IS THAT ALL THE DEAD BEAT PARENTS KNOW HOW TO WORK IT TOO. LEAVING THE SINGLE PARENT STRUGGLING. BUT YOU KNOW THE CHILDREN ARE NOT CRAZY, I KNOW MINE ARE NOT THEY KNOW WHO TAKES CARE OF THEM AND WHAT I HAVE TO DO TO MAKE ENDS MEET AND THEY KNOW NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS I TRIED MY BEST WITH WHAT I HAD.YES I AM ON FOOD STAMPS AND THE GIRLS ARE ON THE MEDICAL CARD FOR HEALTH INS. BUT YOU KNOW MY GIRLS KNOW I AM THE ONE TAKINGCAREOFTHEM. "

    TIRED OF FIGHTING wrote on Jan 17, 2008 3:13 PM:

    " GET THIS. MY EX LEFT OVER A YEAR AND A HALF AGO LEAVING ME WITH 3 GIRLS. HE JUST STOPPED WORKING AND BECAME DRUG ADDICTED. HE HAS NOT WORKED SINCE THE DAY HE WALKED OUT SO YOU GOT IT NO MONEY FOR ME. I TOOK HIM TO COURT AND STILL NOTHING HE OWES ME OVER 10,000.00 IN BACK PAY. THE COURT JUST SLAPPED HIM ON THE WRIST AND SAID FIND A JOB. NOW HE IS TRIYNG TO GET ON SSI AND HAS A LAWYER FOR THAT. THE JUDGE TOLD ME AS LONG AS HE HAS THAT LAWYER THEIR IS NOTHINGTHECOURTCANDO.ANDJUSTWISHEDMETHEBESTOFLUCK. "

    Fed up Father wrote on Jan 17, 2008 1:09 PM:

    " I am a dad who has gone through the court system to try to get some visitation because everytime I called she never answered, but she gets the check on the 1st of the month. I had proof that she brought my daughter to school barefoot because the school warned her about tardies. My daughter is also failing school. She leaves my daughter with anyone who will babysit. I see my daughter every other weekend even though I had more than enough proof that her mom was clearly after just the child support and could care less. "

    Concerned Parent wrote on Jan 17, 2008 11:06 AM:

    " I can feel the pain of everyone who has written. I am an educated female who is a single mother of three. I love my children because they are a blessing from GOD. Have you ever wondered why the father's are absent. There only job could have been just to help you conceive. The absent parent would probably cause the child more damage than good. Good was with Moses, Abraham and Jacob and he promised he would be with us. the childe support should be the least of your worry.TGFAHC "

    Something's Off wrote on Jan 17, 2008 8:14 AM:

    " Part III: Once the HDD is given the chance and refuses to pay the remainding balance, GARNISHING BEGINS. If the employer refuses to comply with the process, then the employer can be fined with tickets, fines, and a review of his taxes. This is a process that takes some time. "

    Something's Off wrote on Jan 17, 2008 8:08 AM:

    " continuing decided by a judge. Once the judge orders" the habbitual deliquent defendant" to submit his payroll infromation to the local AG's office and to thier employer. And thus wages are garnished. But this takes time and before this happens the H.D.D. is giving time to pay what he owes. "

    Something's Off wrote on Jan 17, 2008 8:03 AM:

    " Five month to pay what? All the back support or his child ages out of the system b/c she is 18? I am sorry to inform NO one missed payment does not constitute wages Garnished. Once he is defined as a habbitual delinquent then wages are garnished, "

    fishy wrote on Jan 17, 2008 7:38 AM:

    " If everyone could have that caseworker. Believe me, my ex is more than 1 month behind and just a phone call is not all it takes to garnish wages. I've been there and tried that. "

    frustrated... wrote on Jan 17, 2008 7:28 AM:

    " continued...... and just too let everyone one i was also on the other side, i was a single mom of 4 kids at one point and my ex didnt pay child support, i had to have them garnish his wages so i have an angle and understand points from both sides, and in all honesty the system is un fair and sucks!!! "

    frustrated wrote on Jan 17, 2008 7:24 AM:

    " bottom line is our system sucks!!!!
    in response to MLG the child support can be used on what she /he wants too spend it on. and the courts will tell you that. in response to system sucks: I also know someone whom he paid child support for 15 years when he found out the child wasnt his and took her to court with a bunch of witnesses that testified she knew from the beginng the child wasnt his and they didnt make her pay him back! continue........ "

    frustrated wrote on Jan 16, 2008 8:55 PM:

    " to somethings off:first off all i dont have to talk to my husband because I PAY THE CHILD SUPPORT EVERY MONTH ,and i can promise you there is nothing wrong with my story if there would be a way i could scan every months reciepts and post them on here i would!and yes you can call and just garnish wages, the worker told me one month late is all it takes! but yet there are ppl i know that are years behind and the sad part is my husband only has 5 months left to pay "

    love u boys dadverymuch wrote on Jan 16, 2008 8:07 PM:

    " i am a father of 2 i pay my child support but i can not see my kids i h
    ave to call every 2 weeks to set a time to pick them up she never ans. the phone.she moved away vilation her court order 2 i hope god "

    System Sucks wrote on Jan 16, 2008 6:04 PM:

    " How about a man who signed the birth certificate because the woman told him the child was his after six years he found out that the child wasn't. She told someone that the child was not his but she was scared the state would make her pay the money back he did a DNA to prove the child was not his the state still garnished this mans check. Thats how some women are. "

    MLG wrote on Jan 16, 2008 4:19 PM:

    " Do all mother use their child support on thier child or themselves? Is that right or wrong? "

    BEEN THERE wrote on Jan 16, 2008 2:43 PM:

    " JUST RAISE YOUR CHILD AND DONT WORRY ABOUT HIM, AND NO DONT EVER LIE TO YOUR CHILD. I WAS LEFT PREGNANT, AND MY EX HAS SEEN HIS SON ONLY ONE TIME IN 13 YEARS.. HE PAYS $100.00 A MONTH WHICH AS YOU KNOW DOESNT PAY FOR ANYTHING. BUT I DO NOT WORRY ABOUT HIM . I HAVE REMARRIED AND MY SON CALLS HIM DAD. HE IS MORE OF A DAD THEN HIS BIRTH FATHER COULD EVER BE. SOMEONE WILL HELP YOU FIND THE STRENGTH AND PRAY. GOD WILL BE THERE FOR YOU. "

    Ditto wrote on Jan 16, 2008 1:56 PM:

    " I understand completely. My son's father is ordered to pay child support and he doesn't, yet he still has rights to see my son. This system is messed up but it is what it is. I just give my son everything that he needs and wants. He will know the truth one day!! "

    MOM wrote on Jan 16, 2008 12:36 PM:

    " I KNOW THE SYSTEM TAKES FOREVER, BUT YOU HAVE TO CONSTANTLY BE ON TOP OF IT PUSHING FOR EVERYTHING YOU CAN. IT TOOK YEARS AND I PUT HIM IN JAIL TWICE, I FINALLY GOT THE BACK SUPPORT, THEN BROUGHT HIM TO COURT AND LET MY HUSBAND ADOPT HER. HE DIDNT EVEN SHOW UP TO TRY TO FIGHT IT... GO FIGURE! "

    Angry Mom wrote on Jan 16, 2008 7:59 AM:

    " It is not about the money. Or the lack of money for that matter, I just do not understand why I have to let him be a part of her life. He doesn't want to be, so why should I have to thrust my child upon him? "

    Something's Off wrote on Jan 16, 2008 7:56 AM:

    " Dear Frustrated, first of all there is NO reason to YELL. Second of all, I think you better talk to your husband b/c something isn't right about that story. There is a process to garnighing wages, the ex just can't call up and say "dock his check, he's Late" "

    Mr Mom for 15yrs. wrote on Jan 15, 2008 6:31 PM:

    " I feel your pain, this will sound cruel but don't lie to your child. children remember that they are suppose to spend time with the absent parent and will sometimes question them when they get enough of the lies.Good Luck in getting you support. they forgave my ex for over$38,000backsupport.andstillnotpaying "

    Shoe on the other foot wrote on Jan 15, 2008 5:39 PM:

    " I'm a single father with sole custody (sole protective custody) of my son. His mother has been ordered by the court to pay child support and she hasn't paid in years. "

    FRUSTRATED wrote on Jan 15, 2008 11:00 AM:

    " MY HUSBAND HAS ALWAYS PAID HIS CHILD SUPPORT FAITHFULY YET WHEN WORK SLOWED DOWN AND HE MISSED A PAYMENT(TOLD HER HE WOULD CATCH IT UP) NO HESITATION THEY GARNISHED HIS CHECK!I SWEAR THAT IS WRONG NOT TO MENTION THEY HAVE JOINT CUSTODY AND HE HASNT SEEN HIS DAUGHTER IN 2 YEARS. HASNT BEEN NOTIFIED OF ANY SCHOOL FUNCTION THAT SHE HAD, AND WHEN THEY FOUND OUT SHE SNUCK OUT THE HOUSE HE TRIED CORRECTING HER HIS EX TOLD HIM THATS NOT HIS JOB!! HIS JOB IS ONLY TO PAY CHILD SUPPORT, PLEASE SOMEONE EXPLAIN THAT! "

    Still Waiting wrote on Jan 14, 2008 9:22 PM:

    " I understand your upset. I am a dad that pays child support every month and haven't seen my boy in almost a year. The mother makes a agreement in court but as soon as were out of court she breaks it. The court does nothing to her. "

    Been there done that wrote on Jan 14, 2008 9:13 PM:

    " What about the fathers that do pay on time every month? Then the mother makes the child call "Dad" saying I need money for soccer, the mall, movies, etc...? What is mom doing with this money??? Why is it mom calls a week before it due wanting to know where
    itis??Maybemomneedstogetoffofherbuttandgetadecentpayingjob?Godforbid,thenmaybeDadwonthavetopayasmuch???Getoffyourduffsandgetarealjob. "

    Same Boat wrote on Jan 14, 2008 4:51 PM:

    " I think what is harder is watching him pick her up in his brand new truck to go to his brand new house while still in arrears and not having insurance on her. I pay that. It's a struggle and so not fair. dead beat dad's law..bogus! "

    Chris Walker wrote on Jan 14, 2008 1:49 PM:

    " For me it was once hard to pay child support because for may years i paid fithfully. And during those years and even now I do not get the oppotunity to see my daughter. I ponder over the last 10 years of going in and out of court fighting to see my children but the mother is for some reason or another will not let that happen. but she was and still is happy to recieve my payments. So i stop not realizing it was hurting the children. With my children moter it is and will always be about money. "

    Ashley Orduna wrote on Jan 14, 2008 9:35 AM:

    " This happens all the time, to moms and dads equally. You do the best you can, with what you have. No one said raising a child is easy. The sacrifices you make now, will pay off in the end. Your child will understand later. "

    Single Father wrote on Jan 14, 2008 9:27 AM:

    " I understand the pain, there are just as many low life moms, as there are dads. You can't always tell the future. It's sad as adults, we have to learn the hard way, but who says that our children have to learn this at such a young age? "

    FOOD FOR THOUGHT wrote on Jan 13, 2008 8:14 PM:

    " SOUNDS LIKE A PERSON THAT DOESN'T DESERVE TO SEE THE CHILD. WHAT A PLUG AND SORRY EXCUSE FOR A FATHER!!!!!! "

    I feel your pain wrote on Jan 13, 2008 6:47 PM:

    " Come on "just curious" lets be real. Who are you to sit here and question someone that is going through this. We can't see the future to know how someone will be!! It's not an easy thing being a single mother/father. So lets be a little more mature about it. "

    Just Curious wrote on Jan 13, 2008 3:18 PM:

    " Why did you decide to have a child with this loser? "

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